overwhelmed
So I'm feeling lots of different stuff latley and have just needed to get a load off my chest. First off
School- it's stressful- its expensive- I feel like it will never end-I talked with my advisor last week and we changed my major-I was hating my business classes-shocked me-I thought I would love them-and I just didnt feel right about it- plus they havn't put them all online yet- such a hassle- so now my minor is my major- I'm officially a communications major and my minor is in visual arts- the only problem with that is.... more comm classes- which I love- just means maybe 2-3 more semesters than what I thought it would take to be done.
I'm pretty discouraged.
And I have to admit I'm sick of studying late into the night to be able to get my homework done and I'm worried how I'll handle these classes when the new baby comes. I'm also peeved that because I'm finishing online I have to take the classes they have available-it makes me so sad looking at all these cool things I could be learning and taking but I'd have to be in Rexburg to take them.
Can't we just move back there for a year? So I can have skills in something I adore.
That really makes me sad inside.
I'd love to be taking photography and digital media- instead I get organizational Comm and Family foundations-don't get me wrong it's worth it for Brandon to have a great job but sometimes I feel like I sacrificed a lot to be here and I get frustrated. I usually have a good attitude it's just worn on me lately.
Mod- it's been on the backburner for about a month and I'm struggling with what I want to do next. I feel like I'm coming to a reinventing point in my life and am very unsure of what to do.Will I let people down? What is it that my heavenly father wants me to do with my life. What will really make me happy? Is my timing just wrong?What does it take to truly succeed?Will I ever make sense to myself? Who am I?
And finally-I miss my sisters-yeah I really wish I could be there for them more
Through all this muck in my head- I'm glad I have Brandon. He's wonderful, Have I mentioned lately that I love him beyond words.I hope I get some answers and some clarity. Hoping I can reinvent me to be a better person.
May I suggest an awesome blog that my friend and some of her friends write? It is called Beinglovely.blogspot.com it will lift your spirits.
ReplyDeleteSecond of all....if I Melissa Turney...the QUEEN of ONE TRACK can have a baby and three weeks later start my final (and toughest) semester of school then devote over 40 hours a week to it until December...than you Bree Johnson GODDESS of MULTITASKING can go to school run a company, and be a mother to three chillens AND watch Martha Stewart on a daily basis AND complete half her projects and still have time for a bubble bath in the evening. I know you can do it!
I understand about the Rexburg thing...I could live and die in Rexburg to tell you the truth. Heck I could live and die in Utah but right now I have to sacrifice what I want for Adam's career. When I realize that it frustrates me at times and I can't say I've always been happy about it. Just know that you are where you need to be and not just because of Brandon's job but because of the people you are supposed to meet along the way.
One last thing- sister. Totally understand. My sis is going through a time right now being the only one at home being all alone while Sean and I are gone and I feel so guilty at times.
YOU STAY STRONG~ Just tell yourself "There is nothing I won't do to accomplish my goals and there is nothing I CAN'T do"
Oh Bree, I heart you! I understand your stresses and it's totally OK to feel that way. We're allowed to be stressed, frustrated even selfish! Just remember that your Heavenly Father is there! Ask, and follow! Brandon is a wonderful support to you and you have friends and family all over who love you and are there for you no matter what! You won't let anyone down. We're all so proud of how far you've already come and know you will do great things... no matter what they are! Also, who needs BYU ot take photography? Ask someone close who you admire to teach you a few things (probably cheaper too!) But above all, know we all love you... NO MATTER WHAT!
ReplyDeleteBree you know there's a photographer in Brandon's side of the family right in Calgary. Lara might be willing to teach you some things. She's awesome with the photography.
ReplyDeleteOh and I was stopping by your blog to give you this link. Got it off one of my twitter followers and immediately thought of you first.
http://www.re-nest.com/re-nest/inspiration/from-the-closet-to-the-couch-13-ways-to-repurpose-old-clothes-098922
Hang in there girl. LOVE you!
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